When the worst happens, and a loved one dies, most of us haven’t got a clue what to do. Who should I contact? What happens to the body of my loved one? Can I look after it at home?How do I arrange a funeral? Do I need a Funeral Director or can I do it myself? Bereaved families in the UK actually have quite a few options (despite what you might think), regarding the care and handling of the body, as well as the type of funeral arrangements they can make.

The moment of death

The exact moment when someone dies is not always clear. When a person dies, you may notice that:

they stop breathing
their face suddenly relaxes
they may look peaceful.

What to do if someone has died

If you are in a hospital, hospice, or care home, tell a member of staff that the person has died.

If you are by yourself at home, call the GP or district or community nurse as soon as you feel able to. They will arrange a visit to confirm that the person has died. If they are seeing patients, they may need to finish their clinic before they visit.

Getting support for the family

This will be a very sad or distressing time for the immediate family, as well as other family members and friends. Getting the right emotional and spiritual care and support is important. The person’s nursing team – including their Marie Curie Nurse if they have one – can help. They can also arrange further bereavement support, so that the bereaved do not have to cope with their feelings alone.

They can also contact the free Marie Curie Support Line for emotional support on 0800 090 2309

Caring for someone’s body after death

What happens next may depend on whether the person died at home or in a hospice or hospital.

Customs or preferences when someone has died

If a healthcare professional is there when the person dies, they will check the person’s care plan to see if there are any religious or other customs that need to be followed. The family can tell them if there is anything they should or should not do.

Care after death

This may include washing the person’s body, dressing them in clean clothes and arranging their hair. This is sometimes called ‘last offices’ or ‘laying out the body’, although these mean different things to different people.

If a Marie Curie Nurse or another healthcare professional is present, the family can ask them to do it for them, or ask them to help the family do it. Family members may wish to stay for this, or they may prefer not to be in the room. There is no right or wrong decision − do whatever feels comfortable.

For religious or personal reasons, the family may not want a healthcare professional to lay out the body. This should be in the care plan, but the family can let them know their wishes.

Any equipment, such as a syringe driver, should be left in place. A healthcare professional will remove it after the death has been verified.

There is no rush to do anything for the first few hours after death. At home, one will first need to arrange for a medical professional to come to confirm the death – this takes about 10 minutes. Washing and dressing is best done when there is no rigor mortis (stiffness). This begins about 3 to 6 hours after death and eases again about 12 to 72 hours after death. Your loved one can lie wherever seems appropriate – on a bed, in a special place or in a coffin. Everybody will naturally decompose over time and this can create an odour one is unaccustomed to but this would very rarely be a problem in less than a week, especially if one keeps the room cool and place ice packs on and around a torso. Whilst body fluids need to be considered, a few straightforward practical steps are all that is needed to deal with them, as in life e.g. continence pads. One would not need to pack orifices with cotton wool. There are simple ways to close the eyes and mouth but it may be that the eyes and mouth do not stay naturally fully closed. This is not a problem unless it is disturbing to someone, in which case a handkerchief can cover the face.

Next steps.

The GP or a qualified medical professional will visit to confirm the death and issue a Medical Certificate of Cause of Death. Once you have the certificate, you must register the death within five days (eight days in Scotland) at the local register office.

You can then contact a funeral director (if that is what you wish to do) to arrange for the body to be moved and start making funeral arrangements.

Use the ‘Tell Us Once’ service to notify government departments about the death.

Inform other relevant organisations (banks, utilities, insurers, etc.).

Arrange the funeral once you have the necessary paperwork.

If you are handling the deceased’s estate, check if you need probate and value the estate .

Returning medication

If the person has any leftover medicines, it is important to dispose of them safely. One should not keep them, throw them in the bin or flush them down the toilet. People usually return any leftover medication to a pharmacy. Needles should be put in a safe container – the nurse or another healthcare professional should be consulted on how to dispose of them

Some people find removing the medication upsetting. If you’re finding it difficult, you can ask a healthcare professional for help.

Main options for the body

1. Burial is the most traditional option, where the body is interred in a cemetery or burial ground. Arrangements are typically made through a funeral director, but families can also organise a burial themselves if they wish.

2. Cremation is a common alternative to burial. If chosen, a doctor must be informed promptly as extra documentation is required. Ashes can be kept, scattered, or buried according to family wishes.

3. Direct Cremation is a simpler, lower-cost option where the body is cremated without a formal funeral service at the crematorium. Ashes are returned to the family, who can hold a memorial at a later date if desired.

Keeping the deceased body at home

For expected deaths, families may choose to keep the body at home until the funeral. Funeral directors or healthcare professionals can provide advice and support for this option. Many people are surprised when they hear that others opt to handle a loved one’s body at home, or that they even legally can. Home funerals, also referred to as family-directed funerals, allow families greater control of a loved one’s arrangements, reduce funeral costs, and help normalize mortality.

Hospital or Mortuary Care

If the person dies in hospital, the body is usually kept in the hospital mortuary until funeral arrangements are made. Families can choose to have the body remain there until the day of the funeral.

Can the family transport a deceased body themselves in the UK?

Yes, a dead body can be transported without recourse to a professional service provider under UK law. This is worth knowing because it is something that is widely misunderstood in Britain where it remains the norm to appoint funeral directors to do this sort of work. If someone dies at home, then you will need a doctor’s certificate that declares the death officially before you can move them to a suitable location until the funeral can be arranged.

Firstly, transporting a deceased body needs to be done respectfully. The body will need to be covered and laid flat out. Therefore, the only sorts of vehicles that are appropriate for this are vans and estate cars. Transporting a deceased body using an inappropriate vehicle should not be attempted or it is feasible the authorities could take action. Nevertheless, so long as it is done appropriately, the body of a loved one can be transported from their home or from a hospital morgue without incurring the charges of a typical firm of undertakers.

Emphatically, lifting a body that has been bound in sheets or placed into a coffin is not a one-person job. A minimum of four people should be assigned to such a task. Everybody involved should be prepared for the psychological impact of handling a deceased body since this is likely to be the first time for most people. Equally, they will need to be in reasonable physical condition.

Next, the police should be informed. If not, then they will have the right to stop the vehicle. Transporting a deceased body is allowed but disposing of it is another matter, something that is highly regulated. Police officers who are unaware of ones intentions may understandably assume something untoward is going on and take action accordingly. This is advisable when moving the deceased body to the mortuary as well as when taking it from there to the burial site or crematorium. Unless the deceased body is in a hearse, suspicions may come to the fore, something that can be avoided with a simple notification.

There are slightly different rules that apply in England compared to Scotland. As such, it is imperative that the local Procurator Fiscal in Scotland is informed if the body will be transported by anyone over the border. The same goes for the local coroner’s office in England if one intends on taking it to Scotland.

What happens to the body at the funeral directors?

If someone dies other than that at hospital, then it is likely that the funeral directors will have collected the body. It will then be held in the funeral director’s own mortuary where bodies can be stored at appropriate temperatures to achieve longevity and reduce decay.

Families will sometimes wish to visit their love ones and funeral directors can accommodate this with special viewing/family areas for this to happen.

The funeral directors will prepare the body for the funeral arrangements including washing and dressing it.

What is the embalming of a body?

Embalming is where the blood and fluids of the body are removed and replaced with special liquids to aid longevity and also appearance of the deceased. This is not always done, but likely will be done where the family wish to view the body, and or where there is to be an open coffin funeral.

Essentially, embalming will slow down the natural breakdown of the body. So, if it is done, it will ordinarily be done soon after death. And, it also follows that sometimes embalming is not an option (eg where the body is discovered some time post death and it has therefore already decayed significantly).

What is the ‘Green Form’ and why is it needed?

In between the body being taken into the care of the funeral directors, and the funeral, the family (or executors) will register the death with their local registrars. They (the registrars) will issue 3 important documents:

death certificate (different to the medical certificate)
tell us once form (for the executors to notify the Govt agencies of the passing)
‘Green Form’ (critical for the disposal of the body)

Without the green form, nobody has the legal authority to bury/cremate the body – hence it is essential.

Natural Burial

One way to celebrate the life of those who love nature is through a natural burial. This is a growing idea based upon a burial which is harmonious with nature, reducing the physical impact of a burial on the environment. Natural burial sites offer a serene atmosphere, which is ideal for creating some beautiful final memories.

There are now over 270 natural burial sites in the UK. The type and standards vary hugely. Some are operated by local authorities alongside their more traditional cemeteries. Some are privately owned and run by the landowners and their families, or by staff they have employed. Some are owned by large corporate companies or are run in partnership between the landowner and a larger ‘umbrella’ organisation. Families would be strongly advised to contact the burial operator and visit the site before a final decision is made.

A natural burial may use natural willow coffins, woven from strips of fully biodegradable willow (or other untreated woods like bamboo). It is thought that the word coffin is derived from the Greek word ‘kophinos’, which means basket. An even simpler alternative to a woven coffin is a shroud. This is a cloth covering which surrounds the body and is made from ingredients which are found in nature like wool with a hazel base. This means everything passes back into the earth over time and greatly deepens the sense of one’s connection to the world.

The cost of a natural burial is lower than an average conventional one due to the simplicity of the occasion and the natural materials which are involved in the process.

If the death was unexpected

Call 999 immediately and ask for ambulance and police services.

Follow any instructions from the operator, including whether to attempt resuscitation.

Paramedics will confirm the death. The police may attend as a routine procedure.

Do not move anything in the area except if you are trying to help the person.

The coroner may be involved to determine the cause of death, which could delay funeral arrangements.